Someone recently requested a "Summer fix"... pics of our girl. Here you are!
I think this was taken one morning at J. Christopher's in Cool Springs (TN)... a great b'fast/lunch spot... they have several locations throughout the southeast. Anyway, Summer was giving her penguin (a Christmas gift from Grammy and Grampy Sponberg) some OJ.
The next two shots were taken at Barnes & Noble in Chattanooga. Nicol was at a ladies' Christmas Tea with a friend, so Summer and I went out on a date. As you can see, she was quite caught up with Curious George. We had a fun time together.
Historically speaking, it seems to me that jealousy is one of the very first evidences of human depravity. Just ask Abel (supposing we could... actually, one day we probably will.)
You know the story. Cain was a farmer, Abel a herdsmen. Cain brought an offering to God from the produce of his farm, Abel brought an offering from the firstborn animals of his herd. God didn't approve of Cain's offering, Abel's He did. (Genesis 4:3-5, The Message)
And Cain was ticked off... with God.
Who are you to tell me that what I have offered is not acceptable? Cain had a little of his father in him, some Sinatra too... I did it myyyyyyy waaaaaaay! I can see him now... face flushed, palms sweating, heart racing, blood pressure spiking, pupils dilating, teeth grinding, fists clenched. Heck, I can almost feel it myself. Am I alone here?
The quality in Abel (i.e., his faith, see Hebrews 11:4) that would arouse Cain's jealousy toward his brother could have just as easily been cause for admiration and affection. But that's not what happened because jealousy was not the primary passion revealing itself in that moment... jealousy was the fruit of Cain's anger... and his anger was toward God... and he was angry with God because God told him that he had not done well, that he had failed to do the right thing... and when God pricks our hearts with his truth it has the tendency to make us furious, fighting mad, and vengeful... so Cain asked his brother to take a walk... and you already know the rest of the story... Cain was angry and then became jealous and then he hated/murdered his brother.
But I'm thinking there's at least one other layer to unwrap here. The murder is easy to see and so is the jealousy and so is the anger with God... it's all very explicit in the story. But here's something deeper to consider... can't tell you if I'm right or not, but I'll go with it anyway... and here it is, one word: blessing. Cain didn't have God's blessing. I'm not talking about 'blessing' as in steady rains and crop abundance. I'm talking about 'blessing' as in favor and pleasure and regard (as the text puts it in Genesis 4:4-5).
And we ALL, in the deepest parts of our soul, want God's blessing, His favor, his kindness towards us, His approval, His regard. Every single one of us. Cain's parents had it at one time... God looked at everything He had made one day, Adam and Eve included, and He said this is so good. Adam and Eve had peace with God, peace with each other, and neither one of them knew anything about shame. And then Hell entered the garden and God's blessing was gone... not His presence, not His mercy and not His grace, but His blessing... His regard and pleasure and favor for what was taking place... gone... everything had changed... and the results infected the hearts of Adam's sons like staph infects the bloodstream.
There is a beautiful reality to the larger story here... God's blessing, the affirmation we all desire, is available to everyone, and it is available via what I will call The Way of Abel... and it's called faith. Abel offered his best in faith and he received God's blessing. Cain didn't offer his best, for whatever the reason, and did not receive God's blessing.
And the results were catastrophic.
God help us to live by faith. Thank You for the blessing comes with that.
It is impossible to please God without faith. --Hebrews 11:6
Green is definitely not my favorite color, but there are a few certain exceptions... a Boston Celtics jersey, the dyed Chicago River on St. Patrick's Day in the Windy City, the invitingly lush hue of a golf course's precisely manicured Zoysia grass, the new-life tints of spring.
To me, these vibrant and deep greens are beautifully appealing to the eye, but there exists a shade that is downright ugly... jealousy.
"The jealous are troublesome to others, but a torment to themselves."-[1] One man describes jealousy as "a mental cancer."-[2] Solomon says it "corrodes the bones."-[3] It "injures us with the dagger of self-doubt" says another.-[4]
Sadly, "it is in the character of very few men to honor without [jealousy] a friend who has prospered."-[5] It often "shapes faults that are not" truly present in others... at least not to the extent that our evil eyes might see.-[6] It is a powerful force that can leave one trudging along "under that hovering cloud, jealousy, whose acid raindrops blurred my vision and burned holes in my heart."-[7]
Jealousy... a terribly ugly shade of green... a most destructive passion... a seductive demon... a divisive influencer... an almost-instant result of the first Adam's fall from grace... an undeniable presence that crouches at the door of every heart... an occupant of the flesh that must be subdued and restrained, lest it run roughshod over its host.
I've often heard the expression "green with envy" but I did not know its origin. Apparently, this widely used phrase is attributed to William Shakespeare, the brilliant English poet and playwright.
Before his time, "a green complexion (i.e., pale and sickly) was associated with other things besides envy: these included fear, ill-humor and illness. In a famous passage, Iago warns Othello to 'beware, my Lord, of jealousy; it is the green-eyed monster which doth mock, the meat it feeds on,' a metaphor from the green-eyed cat family which is prone to play with (mock) its victims as a cat plays with a mouse. Though green has continued to have other associations, notably immaturity and gullibility, it is [jealousy] that now predominates."-[8]
Leave it to a devilish character like Iago, in a classic work like Othello, to capture a timeless human reality.
And let me be the first to say that the green-eyed monster named Jealousy crouches at the door of my heart, mocking and toying with my flesh, desiring to divide and destroy.
It is indeed a dreadful shade of green.
========== [1] William Penn, Some Fruits of Solitude, 1693 [2] B.C. Forbes [3] Proverbs 14:30, The Message [4] Grimutter [5] Aeschylus [6] William Shakespeare, Othello [7] Unknown [8] http://users.tinyonline.co.uk/gswithenbank/sayingsg.htm
It's been quite some time since I've updated you on the sale of our house. Bad news first... it hasn't sold yet. Good news... there has been a steady stream of people who have looked at it and there are several people interested... most of them, however, have to sell their house before making an offer on ours... there are two couples who are not in that situation, but are looking at two other houses in addition to ours, and are yet to get back to our realtor with an offer.
We continue to wait, eagerly and hopefully and prayerfully... and in reality it's all good news because it will sell when it's supposed to sell (and I'm trying really hard to avoid all the usual spiritual and theological cliches...)
Us
We are doing ok. Christmas was better than expected, but still quite difficult at times. I really believe Nicol and I are growing thru this and have come closer as a couple. We have lots of work to do in our marriage, many hurdles to get over, many mountains to climb. But, in the words of Dan Allender, our marriage is worth all the fight and struggle and work we can give it.
And, of course, Summer keeps us laughing and moving forward.
Funnies
Speaking of Summer, I haven't mentioned any of her funny sayings lately...
The other day, when Nicol was putting her down for a nap, she asked her mother to turn off the lights. Nicol told her the lights were already turned off and that the light she saw was the sun shining thru the window. So what did Summer say? "It's ok, my daddy can reach it. He's a big boy." :-)
Nicol told her she was going to get her hair colored the other day and Summer said, "Hot pink?"
Summer and Nicol were walking out the door today and Summer said, "I know, I know. It's a hard change." (I have no idea why she said that.)
I was talking to her the other night before she went to bed, and she wasn't settling down, so I had to get after her a little bit (can't remember exactly what I said), but she said, "That's my point, daddy."
Last week Nicol and I were cleaning up after dinner and the next thing I knew, Summer had a wooden spoon in her hand, swatting me on the leg, saying, "That's not respectable." (No idea what prompted that one either.)
Prayer
We will be traveling this weekend. Nicol will be part of a women's retreat on Saturday. I will be speaking on Sunday evening and Nicol will be singing then too. Would appreciate your prayers for all of that.
We also need your prayers regarding the sale of our house... especially that we would trust God's timing... which is such a difficult thing, but He knows what is best.
Pray for safety and protection over us as a family and for our marriage, that we would continue to grow in oneness and that God's purposes for marriage would be manifested in our relationship.
Pray for Summer... that God would stir her heart at a very young age with a desire for Him and that she would realize her need for Jesus.
Pray for me as January comes to a close... that I will catch a glimpse of what God has for us in 2009.
We've heard the sound bite hundreds of times... I have a dream. It's the tag-line of what is widely considered to be one of the greatest speeches ever delivered. And it was the heart cry of a man, Dr. Martin Luther King, whose birthdate we observe on the third Monday of January every year, around the time of his January 15 birthday.
Did you know that it was President Ronald Reagan who signed the holiday into law in 1983? Or that it was first observed in 1986? Or that there was enough resistance to this holiday that only as recently as the year 2000 did all 50 states actually observe it for the first time?
So, why post this? Well, candidly, I'm posting this because the issue that King raised in his speech (and in his mission in general) is an issue that is near and dear to the heart of God... justice. It's an issue that can certainly be a trendy bandwagon to jump on, and many have, and many more will, but the Scriptures don't allow us to just take this up as another do-good cause... we are called to live it.
The prophet Micah put it this way... He's already made it plain how to live, what to do, what God is looking for in men and women. It's quite simple: Do what is fair and just to your neighbor, be compassionate and loyal in your love, and don't take yourself too seriously - take God seriously. (6:8, The Message)
If you have the time, watch the video, or read the transcript, or both, which are posted below.
One thing though... don't get hung up on the I have a dream parts. There is so much more to the message. Case in point... we must make the pledge that we shall march ahead. We cannot turn back. There are those who are asking the devotees of civil rights, 'When will you be satisfied?' We can never be satisfied as long as our bodies, heavy with the fatigue of travel, cannot gain lodging in the motels of the highways and the hotels of the cities. We cannot be satisfied as long as the Negro's basic mobility is from a smaller ghetto to a larger one. We can never be satisfied as long as a Negro in Mississippi cannot vote and a Negro in New York believes he has nothing for which to vote. No, no, we are not satisfied, and we will not be satisfied until justice rolls down like waters and righteousness like a mighty stream.
I know that to some this may not make a whole lot of sense. Maybe some feel as though it's not really that big a deal or that these things don't go on anymore. Maybe because a black man will be sworn into office as the 44th President of the United States tomorrow we feel as though the proverbial glass ceiling has been shattered and there is no longer any legitimate reason for blacks to complain about not having a fair shake at a decent life. Maybe some, like me, didn't grow up in an area where justice issues were on the front burner because everyone pretty much looked the same... white. Maybe. Maybe. Maybe. But let's not kid ourselves... prejudice and bias and favoritism and partiality and, yes, racism (however you define it) are alive and well and will continue to affect our world because they are matters of the human heart that cannot be legislated out of society.
I first looked this issue in the face when I moved to Chicago in the Fall of 2001. I noticed that, by and large, the homeless population was black men. Why? I participated in outreaches at Pacific Garden Mission on several occasions with fellow grad students, only to see an audience of a few hundred black men. Why? I attended The Masters golf tournament in Augusta, GA in 2005 and witnessed two amazing realities... Tiger Woods winning his fourth Green Jacket as well as 60-something-year-old-black men working as washroom attendants and teen-aged black men picking up trash on the grounds while white folks like me handled the cash in the vending and souvenir areas. Why? I've listened to a fellow grad student at Moody, who happened to be black, tell me about an experience he had in which a security guard followed him thru a parking lot. Why? I once met a homeless man named Cornelius Canaday at the corner of Chicago Ave & Franklin St in Chicago's Gold Coast area. And I asked him, "Cornelius, what's it like to be a black man on the streets of Chicago?" His response? "I wish people wouldn't look at me like I'm a criminal or like I'm about to do something to them. I'd just like some respect and to be treated with dignity."
And so does Yahweh, the God who calls us to do what is fair and just to our neighbors... the God who works justice and righteousness for all who are oppressed. (Psalm 103:6)
I'm thankful for Dr. King. And, despite our political differences, I am thankful for Barack Obama, the soon-to-be 44th President of the United States of America... because I know that all across America tonight, folks young and old, urban dwellers and suburban-ites too, are more encouraged than ever been before.
[ Martin Luther King's famous speech, delivered on August 28, 1963 in Washington, D.C. ]
Wanted to share some quotes with you from last week's marriage conference with Dan Allender. (For additional information, go to The Path Less Chosen) If you ever have a chance to hear this guy it would be well worth your time and money. Enjoy. I'll probably post a "Part 2" at some point.
"Marriage is... a reminder of what I will never suffer, a reminder of what I don't deserve."
"The #1 basis for division in marriage, for separation and divorce is contempt." (Contempt is defined as disdain and scorn; the feeling with which a person regards anything considered mean, vile, or worthless; it is anything that vilifies, denegrates, cheapens)
"Most differences lead us to contempt, but they are intended to bring us closer." (The end result of which is that a husband and wife see all the good that has been added to his or her life thru their spouse. Differences are meant to help develop deep, sincere gratitud in us.)
"Hope is the realm in which evil assaults us with contempt."
"The world doesn't need good marriages; the world needs broken, difficult, passionate, marriages."
"I am not nearly as bad as I would fear; I am not nearly as good as I would hope." (love that!)
"The answer to one's unique calling may be found in the answers to these questions... [1]what makes me cry?[2]what makes me angry?[3]what is my story?[4]what is my 'yes'? (i.e., positive absolutes, 'this has to happen and I'm going to do everything I can to make sure it does') [5]what is my 'no'? (i.e., negative absolutes, 'ain't no way I'm allowing that to go on anymore, not on my watch')"
"What does it mean to be a man who leads? It means you repent first, you allow yourself to be broken first."
"A woman brings grace... strong, fierce grace." (This was an incredible point... he was talking about the wife as the helper and he focused on that word in the story of Adam and Eve. The word for helper occurs only 5 times in the OT... one being when God said it wasn't good for Adam to be alone so he would make a helper suitable for him. The other 4 usages refer to God being a helper in very difficult circumstances. But more than a helper, He is a deliverer and protector and, in particular, He is those things in times of war. Hence, a wife brings grace... strong, fierce grace.)
Key word for women = "lonely" (because of their profound desire for relationships)... key word for men = "futility" (why bother? everything I do is constantly being undone)
A woman naturally says, "I'm too much" (for my husband to understand)... a man naturally says, "I'm not enough" (for her) (Great combination, huh!?)
My cousin Andrea, who lives in my home town of Washburn, Maine, took these pics at 7:00am (EST) this morning at her house. Now that's cold!
Today, schools in Williamson County, Tennessee are closed because it's too cold! The temp? 7 degrees/-3 windchill as of 8:00am (CST).
By the way, schools in Washburn are open today! They're tough up there. When I was a kid we used to walk to school in those temps... up hill, both ways, in four feet of snow... and we loved it! ;-)
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